Monday, May 31, 2010

Not-Quite-Adventures in BBQ Assembly

Now that I live in a house with a yard, I thought I'd invest in a charcoal grill.

Yesterday at Target I moseyed back to the seasonal section and found the BBQ aisle. They had lots of grills in various sizes and shapes. Propane? No thanks. My dad was always a charcoal man back in his grilling days (pre-condo life), and I intend to follow in his footsteps.

I didn't want a big fancy grill. I don't really know what I'm doing, and I don't want to get in over my head financially. I don't need a $80 grill. I don't need to spend $80. I know that Weber is a trusted brand in grills, but they're a little too expensive for my tastes. Even the tiny little ones were $30. You know - those little ones that sit just above the ground, where you have to sit down on the ground to even use them. Those are $30. They probably have enough surface area to cook one hamburger patty at a time.

But then I saw a short little square grill. It probably comes up to about my mid-thigh, so I don't have to sit down to use it (but if I had a lawn chair, I could). It's not a Weber. It's Thermos brand - which is funny, since I didn't know they made anything other than a... well, a thermos. It's big enough for a few burgers or brats, and I think it will serve my needs well. Like the little Weber, this guy was also $30.

I bought the other necessary accouterments. BBQ tools like a flippy spatula thing, tongs, skewers, that sort of thing. I bought coals and lighter fluid. I bought brats and turkey burgers and buns and potato salad and chips (well, technically I already had the turkey burgers). I'm ready to go.

Today I opened the box that the grill came in. As a person who has purchased and assembled many things from IKEA, I was certain I could handle anything this box could throw at me.

Wait a minute, what does that say? "Tools needed: Screwdriver (not included) and open ended wrench (not included)." What are these tools of which it speaks? Ok, I have a screwdriver. Somewhere. And we're not talking orange-juice-and-vodka here. But I don't own a wrench. Open-ended or otherwise.

I call my dad, naturally, because that's what you're supposed to do in these situations. He told me what an open-ended wrench is (it's just a wrench, really) and gave me some tips on how to actually use the grill once it's assembled. That's good, since I've never actually done this before.

I still haven't assembled the grill. I'm afraid of it now. It has so many little pieces. And I don't have a wrench. But I figure that's one of those things I should have. I should go buy a wrench. Then maybe, one of these days, I'm going to get to actually have some adventures in grilling.


  1. Do not be afraid of the grill, grasshopper. You are superior to the grill. You will become a grill master.

  2. We have a little gas grill that we could give to you.... But yeah, don't be afraid of the grill.