Just a quick post here before I go to bed. I fully meant to write this earlier this evening, but I was distracted my a Netflix DVD that came in the mail.
Back when I was in high school, especially in its earlier years, I was extremely shy. Being involved in music and drama really helped me break out of my shell, but I've always been on the shy side. Even now, when I often describe myself as an extrovert, I'm really just shy little me putting on a face of boldness, pretending I can be an outgoing person.
This all changes in an online setting. As many of you know, I'm active on a lot of the online dating websites. My favorite is OK Cupid mainly because it's free, and has a lot of fun features like personality tests and questions to answer.
On the internet, especially on dating sites, I'm very outgoing. I'll send messages to anyone. On OK Cupid, I'm the opposite of shy.
Today I fear I was a little too bold. I think I made a mistake and came on way too strong. I read a guy's profile that seemed to be written directly to me, and of course, the anti-shy that I am there, I said exactly that in a message to this guy who I've never even had contact with. He's just some words and pictures on a screen. For all I know, none of those pictures are real, and all the words are fiction.
Or, worse, it's all real and I scared off the perfect guy because I'm not shy when I should be. I've been compulsively checking my account all day. No reply, but he's logged on to his account since I sent the message. He had to have seen it.
I'm such an idiot. Apparently when I let my fingers do the talking I forget to let my brain do the thinking.
5 days ago